Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Things That Make You Go Hmmm?

Mom bloggers the world over have a dilemma: how much info is too much to share about your child, and at what age does it become an invasion of privacy? Long ago, I stopped relaying many personal details about Caroline because that is her story to tell and not mine. Lily's story always seemed like mine to tell, most likely because she is my baby. The funny thing is, she is not anymore. She is also aware that she is the source of much of my writing. She does something and will say "You can Facebook this if you want" or "This is not for Facebook, Mom." When we see people who know me, but not her, and they ask questions about her, she looks at me like "What the hell, Mom?"

I am in a quandary, here. I want to be honest about my journey as a parent and especially parenting a little girl like Lily. I was just looking at the blogs that I love and one commenter brought up an interesting point: what will happen when a blogger's child gets older and some obnoxious teens find her blog and read all of the personal details about her child? I know if that happened to Lily, my heart would break. We are starting down a path to help her find out how to become the best possible Lily that she can be. My original plan was to share this journey to help other parents. But, is it my journey alone? Other bloggers have talked to their children and been given permission, but truly can a nine year old child give informed permission?

Lily will be my guide here. She has already on her own brought up going to see a doctor for testing (the direct quote was "Apparently my mother feels I need to be evaluated for, what is it, Mom? Oh yeah ADHD"). I am not sure if I will share the results here. Our family has such a complicated history of "alphabet syndromes." I don't think that is anything to be ashamed of. We are pretty honest about the whole thing and make jokes about it all the time. Not everyone is as comfortable, though. It is my experience that every time I tell someone that I have a learning disability (unless they are some way in my same boat), they look at me differently. It takes years of confidence and plain not giving a crap to deal with that. My little girl is not ready for that, nor should she be.

I want to be a voice for parents with unique children, but not at the expense of my amazing girl's dignity. This is honestly the first time that I am glad this blog is so hard to find and am not jealous of the mom bloggers with book deals. Luckily, I have so much more to say. I have wondered what my blog would be like if it didn't revolve around my children. Maybe it is time to find out.

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