Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Happy Feet

Caroline is at scout camp everyday this week and I have promised Lily "adventures" everyday. She is starting dance class next week, so our first adventure was a trip to the mall to get tap and ballet shoes. I am so excited for her. The only thing she loves more than dancing is her baby dolls. Of course she dressed for the occasion by wearing a sparkly pink shirt, her "everyday wear" purple tutu, a purple baseball hat and sparkly purple sunglasses. To quote Tim Gunn "It's a lot of look." Once we got home, she spent the next two hours dancing to the sound track from Cats (my mom took us all to see it on Father's day). She had numerous costume (including shoes) changes while I stopped and started the CD to wait for her. She was the happiest little girl in the world. I was able to convince her to stop for lunch and we sat and chatted about Cats. How magical IS Mr. Mistoffelees? Should Deuteronomy have chosen Grizabella? You know, the usual philosophical thoughts. Then we looked for a Cats DVD on the computer. It was quite an adventure.

The Beauty of a Well Stocked Handbag

A couple of weeks ago, it was time for my annual exam. This is never a very pleasant thing for a woman, but I dutifully went. It had been awhile since I'd been to my doctor's office because of scheduling conflicts. As I reached to open the door, I noticed a new plague by my doctor's name. He was now sharing his office with a urologist. What? Boys in the waiting room of my ob/gyn? Are you kidding? I sat down to wait and an older gentleman who obviously smoked quite a bit sat down next to me. The smell was starting to give me a headache. He was finally called into see the doctor. No sooner had he left than another man sat down next to me. This one reeked of urine! Now along with the headache I started to feel nauseous. I discreetly reached into my purse and pulled out some vanilla hand lotion. I rubbed it all over my hands and then sat their resting my cheek on my hand. I was finally called back and all set to switch doctors after this visit. The thing that I forgot is my doctor is so sweet. He came into the room and instantly gets this dreamy look on his face and says "What is that smell? My wife was wearing perfume like that when I first met her." I didn't have the heart to explain that he'd filled his waiting room with stinky boys and I had no other course of action. So, I sat their in my paper gown and chatted with him about how powerful a scent vanilla is. Once again, I am saved by "Armageddon Bag."

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Life's a Potty

Long time no blog, huh? Well it's because I went back to college and consequently my home turned into a frat house. It is no secret that I am married to the sweetest and funniest man, but he knows nothing about house keeping, food groups etc. I have been killing my brain with the world's hardest and most ridiculous math class (Do I really need set theory to teach first grade? The powers that be in D.C. think so.) while the house falls down around us. I kick through baskets of clean laundry to get to my dusty algebra book (FOIL method, anyone?)while Lily eats her third Popsicle of the day. I come home at 10:30 pm to find spaghetti on the floor, socks everywhere and juice boxes crushed and discarded in the living room. Is she smashing them on her head first? My lord, I'm one of those homes that needs rescuing from a good British nanny.

Tonight alone, my youngest wondered if the dead house plant could be revived with pee. "It's like water, but it doesn't waste water." Clearly, I'm doing my part to provide her with a green education. Then she almost gave me a heart attack me by asking for a John Cena shirt. As I looked at Rob in horror, he explained that she saw wrestling once and knew it would have enough shock value to get my attention. I am reading about my cousins' children trying to come up with ideas to save the Gulf yet here is Lily watching Caddyshack. At least she decided it "was really very inappropriate" and stopped watching it although she "loved that dancing little furry guy."

One more week of this @#$% class and I can go back to the kind of mother this place needs: loving, literary minded drill sergeant. I will teach Lily to read, listen to Caroline drum, suggest good books for her, make her practice math on the computer, read fun chapter books with the two of them, go to the pool, go to the library (perhaps a book about the water cycle?), make them eat broccoli, and above all else, make them pick up their junk! Next week needs to end soon before Lily starts playing chocolate milk pong.