The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same

Of course it has been crazy busy around here. Do I know any other way to live? I thought that after three years teaching first grade, it would be easier, but there are some many new things this year (like an electronic grade book that hates me). October was the month of: broken dishwasher, hot water heater, washing machine, husband traveling to California for a week, mom with a month long sinus infection, teenager dating, dog chewing important things like American Girl Dolls, and six year old just being six. Despite all the chaos and utter exhaustion, I am going to focus on what we are doing right.

I just read a study that said 40% of children from 0-8 have a T.V. in their room and access to a smart phone type device. This is the one time that I can pat myself on the back. Every other study has me feeling like I've invited the Grim Reaper himself to be my girls' god parent. I don't serve all organic food, I let them watch T.V., they eat processed food, and they have very warped and highly inappropiate senses of humor. BUT, they don't have their own T.V.'s or smart phones. Heck, I don't have a smart phone. The dog just chewed the finger off of the expensive AG doll, there is no way any fancy phone if coming into this mill of destruction.

As for the T.V., that's one area where I have taken a firm stand. Sure we're are a processed food eating, movie watching, T.V. watching family, but we do it as a family. No one is going off to be isolated. It is in the den. There is one in the basement and our room, but they are rarely used. I've stopped feeling guilty about T.V. because that is our family togetherness time. And it is a rowdy good time! We love comedies and sit here and laugh together until our eyes water. Then we repeat our favorite lines over and over for the rest of the week (or in Rob's case, the year). We watch nature documentaries and provide our own witty commentary, usually involving poop or gas jokes. We love to watch shows about antique collectors. They usually lead to Rob or I sharing a story about our grandparents.

It has occurred to me that our T.V. is our modern version of the family fireplace. We are around it all together, engaged. Henceforth, I feel no more guilt! As long as we are doing stuff together and having fun, we're good!

Big Problems. Big Thoughts

Wow! Caroline, Rob, and I had the best discussion about this. The irony is that Rob and I have a history of being on opposites of political debates. We are on the same side here. He is even more fired up than I am most likely because he understands the economics better than me. I think from the heart. He thinks from the numbers. Caroline is taking civics this year and is able to really grasp this. Her question: "Why can't those with more give more?" I do wonder how all this will end. There are many disenfranchised people out there. They are overwhelmed and don't know what to do next. How do we fix this? How do we leave a better or at least tolerable world for our children?

Disillusionment

I am feeling very frustrated right now. I've only watched a little bit of the news about the Occupy Wall Street Movement, mostly because I don't believe unorganized protests work in the US. Rob and I were talking about it and I said "What they really need is a mission statement." That alone proves that I've been spending too much time using the new educational jargon. That doesn't mean that I don't agree with the overall sentiment. I do more than anyone realizes. I am just frustrated by the people who are adding to the chaos. I don't think people in orange jumpsuits with gorilla masks are going to prove the point. The point is greed. I am so tired of people with power and money taking more and more just because they want it. It makes me understand how the ideas of socialism were first born.

As part of a new school system initiative, my class needs to develop a mission statement. Ours is full of ideas of kindness, sharing, and helpfulness. At what age do we abandon those basic ideas? When do we forget the Golden Rule? I am so tired of some many people's lack of compassion for their fellow man. It seems that as long as "I get mine" anything goes. I used to believe that being a good person was enough. If I do my best and be kind, I would have a good life. I know, I do have a good life, I am married to a wonderful man and have two beautiful daughters. Every night I give thanks for my blessings. It is getting harder and harder to maintain my Pollyanna optimism. I really do hope that things change. honestly, something has to give soon. The tension and the fighting are ridiculous.

I guess the best that I can do is teach my girls to be kind and compassionate. I can try to teach it to my students for the time they are with me. I can keep try to pass on kindness. Maybe it will spread. All I do know is that I can't sit here and be bitter. It is a waste of time. Time is priceless. Not even the CEO of the biggest corporation can buy that.

Street Cred

Well, Caroline and seem to have weathered the worst of the teen "smartassery." She gets grouchy and snaps at me, I suggest she try another tone and refuse to talk to her until she adjusts. This seems to be working for the most part. There are still moments of pure emotional roller coaster when I wish to leave her in the woods to live with the wolves (well sometimes she acts like she was raised by them).

She and I have found common ground in movies, books, and music. She has this new found interest in doing well in school and has declared that she wants to "embrace her nerdy side." Fine with me, she's the funniest and wittiest little nerd that I've ever known. Her best friend is this amazingly sharp and driven young lady who cracks me up. They both take music lessons from the same teacher. One day while we were driving home, we started talking about music. She asked me what music I thought they should listen to and I was off on a role! U2,Greenday, The Clash, The Cure, R.E.M., Elvis Costello, The Beastie Boys, and so on and so on! They were both listening to me like I was a professor and they should be taking notes. I quickly shut up before the acknowledgment went to my head. Later, Caroline asked to borrow my CDs! It seems the era of crappy over processed techno pop is over! I knew that she would come to her own tastes. I won't push my singer song writer stuff on her, but the fact that she appreciates the music of my youth is wonderful (and flattering). Next up, the indie radio station.

We have also managed to have a meeting of the minds regarding movies. We just finished watching the updated version of True Grit. Last weekend we watched The Breakfast Club and she loved it. I was shocked at how well it held up over time. I also couldn't believe that communication between adults authority figures and teens hasn't changed a bit. Now she's all excited to go see 50/50 with me! Yay, an indie film kid!! Of course that will be after she and her friend go see the new Taylor Lautner movie. Caroline is in it for the action, her friend is in it for Taylor's other guns. Oh well, they'll have fun.

Things are looking brighter and brighter! Maybe I am just the tinniest bit of a cool mom. Maybe it's just respect. No matter what it's a bond that I don't see breaking.


P.S. As I write this we are watching a VH1 special about the top bands ever. She is loving all the same stuff as me and so surprised that we like the same music. I'm not. What do you think she listened to as a baby.

Hurricane

The weekend after our little earthquake we got hit by Hurricane Irene. Luckily for us, it was mostly a bad storm, wind, rain, and no power outage. I written before about how we Simpson's handle big storms. First we reasonably prepare, then we hibernate! Around here in NoVA, people tend to panic at the idea of a weather event. Traffic is snagged, cell service goes down, and the stores are insane (tell me why people need to buy all of the toilet paper, milk, eggs, and bread?). We have learned to "stay calm and carry on."

Rob watched movies, Caroline watched T.V. through the Wii, Lily watched a movie of her own, and I read. I also made the best meatloaf ever. While the wind roared and lashed outside, we were cozy and calm inside. Until.......

Lily came downstairs for dinner. She'd been upstairs playing quietly (rookie parenting mistake, I know). Her eyes were red rimmed and swollen; she looked like she had been beat up. We thought that she had put something on her face and had an allergic reaction. Lily is going through a frustrating lying phase. I am frustrated because I never know the truth, and she is frustrated because she has spent a good part of the summer in time out. We pumped her for info and dragged her from room to room trying to find what she touched. I washed her face with a cool cloth, but it still looked terrible. Finally, I decided to eat dinner. I really couldn't enjoy my meatloaf at all.

After dinner, I decided to give her a shower and lay another cool clothe across her eyes. If it didn't improve, we were going to have to take her to the ER in a tropical storm. As I got the shower ready, I asked her one more time what she touched. She led me to my bathroom and handed it to me: pink lip liner! It washed right off in the shower!

Who needs natural disasters for excitement? We have Hurricane, Typhoon, Tornado, Earthquake, Blizzard Lily!

Shake, Rattle, and Roll

Well, unless you've been living under a rock, you've heard that Virginia had an earthquake. It was defiantly a new experience for me and honestly one that I wasn't missing. Lily has been at camp every afternoon this week. I took advantage of the "Lily-free" time by scheduling all of Caroline's annual doctors appointments. Caroline was non too happy about this, so I bribed her with Starbucks (also a chance to use up my Starbucks' gift cards).

On Tuesday, we were sitting outside of Starbucks sipping frosty drinks and goofy around before her dentist appointment. All of the sudden the ground started shaking. At first, I thought that it was a truck, then I thought that it was artillery practice from Quantico Marine Core Base. Ladies came running out of the nail salon next door and a bunch of guys dashed out of Starbucks, laptops in hand. Luckily, we had a native Californian sitting outside with us. She calmly told us that it was an earthquake and to just sit still. When it was over, Caroline and I were excited to have experienced something that we never had before, then it sunk in: We just been in an earthquake!! We did what everyone here does in the event of major news and ran to the car to turn on the local news. That's when we heard how big it was. I tried to call my family, but the cell lines were jammed. This prompted a discussion about 9-11. We drove over to the dance studio to check on Lily. She was fine. Everyone we met was excited and wanted to tell their story. The radio announcers kept referring to it as a "shared experience." I'd agree. I was worried that we wouldn't be able to get into the dentist office because it was on the base, but it wasn't a problem.

The rest of this week has been a little stressful. Between aftershocks, thunder storms and the threat of a hurricane this weekend, everyone has been on edge. It has also been hard not to be a little silly about the whole thing and accuse people of over reacting. If you are on the east coast, stay drive and still this weekend. I am hoping that we don't loose power and can use the chance to have another Simpson movie marathon!

The Next Generation

I went to an educational leadership workshop last week with my principal and some other teachers. Aside form the fact that I'd thrown my back out two days earlier and was in a ton of pain, it was a wonderful day. I am really jazzed to try science notebooks with my students this year and got tons of tips. But even better than that were the keynote speakers.

The first speaker was an expert in teaching culturally diverse students. That part was interesting, but it wasn't anything that I hadn't heard before. What really piqued my interest, though was her information about the next generation: The Millennials. This generation considers themselves citizens of the world. They don't see race, religion, or culture. They feel connected to the world through the Internet. They are very informed and can get information instantly. They consider their music, movies, books, and television shows to be very important. They are politically aware. My daughter is one of them.

I am sure that I have blogged about the time that I had my girl scouts plan an activity for Lily's Daisy troop. While they were supposed to be planning, all I heard from the den was gossiping, giggling, texting, and music. I went out there expecting to have seen nothing completed. Nope! While all of that was going on, they had created a power point, lesson plan, poster, and CD of related children's music. Their minds work and process in such a different way. Good grief, I'm a dinosaur. Did my parents ever feel this out of touch?

The closing speaker broke my heart. He had survived the shooting at Columbine in 1999, while his sister had not. His family set up an organization in her memory called Rachel's Challenge. Before her death she had written an essay encouraging others to start a "chain reaction of kindness." The organization holds workshops and presentations encouraging people to do the same. The part that really hit me was when he explained that he regretted that the last words that he spoke to his sister were part of a fight. Before I had sat down to watch him speak, I'd checked my voice mail and heard a very long tear filled complaint from Lily (how did she get my number?) about how this babysitter(her older sister) wasn't working out for her and this was not the fun day she'd had in mind and would I come get her. I briefly wondered if this young man would come and speak to my bickering children.

I left the workshop full of hope. Sometimes, I wonder about the next generation. What kind of leaders would they be. I am sure that our parents wondered them same about us and their parents about them. The next generation is defiantly different than we are, but their seems to be an underlying sense of compassion above all else. I love the idea that the racial divide is closing. My children see no color all they see is good person or not so good person.